World Issues with Rachel: Climate Change

Welcome to a new series in which Rachel picks a topic and talks about it for a bit in hopes of learning and/or teaching something. PLEASE NOTE: The following paragraphs are unresearched, 100% biased, and aimed to drive healthy discussion. You’re encouraged to tell Rachel how wrong (or right!!!) she is. 

The sun is 100% hotter than it was when I was a kid. I can remember playing outside in July and never sweating. Even in junior high we used to walk like, 7 miles to get ice cream and sure it was hot but it was as hot as it gets these days. I lived in Florida for a few years and I swear to God they had a sun that was different than the one that shone north of the Mason-Dixon Line. It was angrier, louder, and a lot more insidious. When I moved back to the land of sane peoples I was relieved because the sun wasn’t trying to radiate me and every cell in my body. Then last summer I was at the beach in Michigan and I thought, “This is definitely the Florida Sun. It’s here and it wants my soul.” And that’s how I know climate change is a real thing.

You guys, it’s happening. The earth is getting warmer, things are melting, weather is getting weird, species are dying, and yet THERE ARE PEOPLE OUT THERE WHO DO NOT BELIEVE IT. How? How can you not believe facts and data and Neil DeGrasse Tyson? Like, there are glaciers that aren’t glaciers anymore because IT’S WARMER WHERE THEY ARE AND ICE NEEDS TO STAY COLD TO STAY SOLID OR IT TURNS INTO WATER.

You know the word “coral”? It’s used to describe an orangey-pink color but ALSO it’s a living thing in the ocean. The problem is that because of climate change coral isn’t so coral anymore; it’s bleaching out which means we’re going to have to find another word for orangey-pink. THANKS FOR MESSING WITH OUR DICTIONARY, CLIMATE CHANGE.

Have we not seen enough disaster movies to know that when the Earth starts to act like a landlord who hasn’t been paid rent in 3 months it’s time to change how we do things? Honestly, I think the majority of us know that our time is limited, and extremely limited unless we do something soon.

Unfortunately, there are people in charge (and people soon-to-be-in-charge) that don’t think the Earth is one oil spill disaster away from changing the locks and throwing our shit out to the curb. I’m pretty sure it comes down to money, because it always comes down to money. They say that climate change is a “theory” that is “unsupported” and is “total bullshit”. We could throw all the numbers, and images, and bar graphs, and maps, and analysis at them all showing that we’re very scientifically fucked and they’d still play dumb. What kills me is that if we were to throw numbers and images and bar graphs and maps and analysis all having to do with their money, they’re all suddenly data scientists.

Look, we have to pay attention to this if we want our kids, and their kids, and their kids (but not mine because they will never exist) to survive. Every person on this planet loves something natural about it, whether it’s green grass or blue skies or mountains or rivers or glaciers or whatever else. I dare say its one of the very few things every human can agree on. We have to put aside laziness and greed and start playing an active role in saving our home.


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